“A conversation is a dialogue, not a monologue. That’s why there are so few good conversations: due to scarcity, two intelligent talkers seldom meet. “
Truman Capote
Very few people actually like small talk and too often a conversation results in wasted time. It is important to understand that good conversation can make or break a relationship. On the flip site, we spend so much of our time trying to make an impression on people and less time trying to listen to what they have to say. If you value time and friendship, you would want to maximize your conversation to end up being a meaningful.
So the next time you are striking up a conversation remember these 4 tips to make sure you leave them with a remarkable conversation and a lastingly positive impression.
Be Yourself
We tend to value “genuine” people and think poorly of those whom we perceive as being “fake”. Being genuine is first of all what makes a conversation, meaningful. Genuine people speak their mind. This is actually a two-step habit. Genuine people take time to figure out their own opinions and perspectives about things, and they are not shy about sharing their thought-out opinions with others. Make the conversation because you want to. If you do not feel like doing it but you feel obliged because of your responsibility, make the effort to do a short talk. If this is to be done out of obligation, you need to motivate yourself into doing it for a certain purpose or incentive.
Be curious.
Curious people are often considered good listeners which is key for great conversation. Curiosity is a fundamental piece of that work and a powerful tool. When talking with others, you can channel your natural curiosity, asking questions that start with “how,” “what,” “when,” “where” and “why,”. Put yourself in the mindset of being curious to learn more about the other person. You’ll listen more intently, your body language will show that you’re engaged, and you’ll naturally think of questions that move the conversation forward. Being curious about others is a highly attractive quality, and it creates immediate interest and intimacy.
Be there 100%
Most of us love to talk, but many of us are not that great as listeners. Hearing isn’t necessarily listening, nor is it necessarily listening well. According to Bernard Ferrari, author of Power Listening: Mastering the Most Critical Business Skill of All, good listening is the key to developing fresh insights and ideas that fuel success. Also, just because you’re quiet and you let others do 80% of the talking, doesn’t mean you’re a good listenerWe are so involved in what we are going to say next that we basically stop paying attention to what the other person is saying and our body language consequently turns to one of impatience or disinterest. The best listeners recognize that they cannot succeed without seeking out information from those around them and they let those people know that they have unique input that is valuable. A great listener listens and stores interesting tidbits for the next conversation. Maybe the person you were talking to mentioned how he was taking up a new hobby or idea for their next great project. Remember the name of the person, where they are from and where does their family live. Remember their children’s names or pet’s name the next time you meet them; they’ll be happy to see how much of an impression they made on you.
Be Nice & Positive
Have you ever met a warm person who made you feel comfortable and relaxed within a few minutes of meeting them. When you’re happy in your own shoes, the world will start to love you for your infectious happiness. Plus, you never know what is going on on the other person’s life of how their day is going so far. Don’t obsess about the bad things in life. Enjoy every moment of life and share your happiness with people around you. Positive people always have a sparkle in their eyes, and draw friends and admirers closer all the time.
The person you are talking to might have met plenty of new faces that day, and he or she won’t necessarily remember what you talked about or said to him/her. But people really tend to remember how you made them feel.
