I’ve got a secret.
I enjoy watching those infomercials for the Kymaro Body Shaper and Curve Control Jeans that come on in the middle of the night. For me, they’re guilty pleasures that I feel even guiltier admitting that I take pleasure in, but probably not for the reasons you might think.
Because I often wake up to write when inspiration strikes, I catch the commercials at least once a week. Viewing the hourlong ads has been an educational experience. I’ve learned a lot about what women worry about when men aren’t around.
I didn’t know what a muffin top was before those programs started to air. At least, I never knew that there was a name for it, but that’s not why I’m so mesmerized by those messages.
Honestly, I think many of the models are hot. I’m sure they have been paid for their appearances and probably don’t even use those items in real life, but they don’t need to resort to trimming aids on my account.
I’ve dated the kinds of curvy women the company’s pitches are aimed at, and I don’t believe they need to wear trusses to look more attractive.
The insinuations of those clothing lines are extremely troubling.
I don’t watch those segments to see how many inches a woman is about to lose when she wraps the measuring tape around her waist. Instead, I see a lovely lady who I’d date even if she wasn’t wearing a pair of slimming pants.
Still, I can’t say that I’ve always been as honest about what attracts me in a woman. During my youthful days, I went out with more ladies because of peer pressure from my friends than I’d like to admit.
In college, I thought my buddies needed to approve of the women I dated. In hindsight, the fact that many men feel embarrassed to tell their pals they prefer women of a certain size is deplorable. And it’s especially hypocritical because many boys face their own body- image issues, albeit in secret.
Women might find it hard to believe, but some guys worry about their appearances as much as they do.
I’ve been skinny all my life. My metabolism has always been too high for me to develop muscle, so my arms have been compared to coffee stirrers more times than I can count.
For that reason, I dealt with my own insecurities for decades, but I’m finally pleased with the person I am today.
As I got older, I began to accept that I was never going to have a bodybuilder’s frame, and I’m OK with that.
I know women contend with body-image issues throughout their lives. Although I can’t eradicate those kinds of negative thoughts, I can say that body measurements don’t matter to all men.
I’m not saying that women shouldn’t wear cinchers if it makes them feel confident. You’ll never see me walking around in shorts that show off my toothpick legs, so I can’t tell anyone else how to contend with their body issues.
Rather, I’ll just say that those products don’t determine your attractiveness, nor is the shape of a woman’s body the only thing that men notice.
Many of us want companions who are compassionate, kind and thoughtful. Those characteristics are often harder to find than a network that doesn’t broadcast infomercials.
Some of us don’t care if you wear a size 6 because we don’t know what that looks like. Besides, it’s just an arbitrary number that doesn’t define the depths of your heart or your mind.
Don’t get me wrong — it’s important to be healthy, but few of us will ever qualify as normal when it comes to our bodies. And we’ll probably never know what normal is because it’s a subjective measurement.
So don’t lose it over Kymaro, ladies. You don’t have to take advantage of that limited-time proposal because men like me can already appreciate what you have to offer.
(c) 2011 Richmond Times – Dispatch.