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“OH CAROL:”

I went for dinner recently with a very nice gentleman.  The date was arranged by my son-in-law. (My date was a friend of my son-in-law’s late father.) At the end of the dinner, this “very nice gentleman” told me that he thought we should split the bill.  I smiled, pulled out my wallet, and asked him what my share was.  And I gave him the money.  But I was stunned.  I thought the man should pay – especially on a first date.  Is he really cheap? Or have things changed?  I’d really like to know.
Stuck with a bill.

LOVE ‘N LIFE’S “OH CAROL” ANSWERS:

Dear Stuck:

How rude!! Yes, he is cheap!  And YES, I agree that the man should pay ESPECIALLY on a first date!  And NO, things have not changed!

I know I am going to hear it from the men on this one but there is that old fashioned thing called chivalry, (especially in the after 50 age range) this is just the chivalrous thing to do. Don't get me wrong, I am well aware that many people are on a fixed income and if this is the case then he should have said so up front. When a "gentleman" is asking a lady out to dinner, he pays, END OF STORY! If he can't afford to pay then say so on the prior 'getting to know you, getting to know all about you' phone calls and let the woman decide BEFORE meeting.

Move on to a more generous man and be treated like a lady... now I am singing again, “You've got to treat her like a lady!"

Yours 4 Love,
Carol

Most Recent First Oldest First Most Popular First

LovesToRead I agree completly, if he is taking her out on the first date he should pay. If he can't afford something fancy, then they should have gone for coffee or a less expensive place. If a man is really interested in a lady, they always find a way to show it. This man just wasn't that in to you. At least you found out right away and can move one to find someone who is.
Sun Feb 27, 2011, 12:20:04 PM EST

ErikD Thing have changed in dating, but I would never expect the women I asked out to pay on the first date. It sounds like he must of thought of you as just a friend he was meeting for lunch or dinner.
Sun Feb 27, 2011, 12:26:53 PM EST

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